and to all a good night

so i have decided i must be the worst blogger ever. i hardly ever remember to write on this thing. maybe once we actually have a computer with internet in our HOUSE it will be different. I am on the job hunt. that is my first goal. find work. and then a house. we looked at a great house here in town that i would love. but jobs are our first priority. so i am looking for something fairly routine...monday to friday, no shift work. that stresses me out too much. and hopefully not a full 40 hour week because that is just a long long week. maybe i am too idealistic. but i have to have hope and i have to aim for what i think i can handle.

moving on, we have finished all our xmas shopping. this year i actually feel like i put more thought and effort into what i bought for people. it feels so good to actually give a real gift and not just an obligatory gift. i love christmas. it's been a great week so far. warren and i visited our new nephew, Nate, yesterday. he is such a cutie! i can't believe how much he looks like a neufeld. crazy. but after his dramatic entrance into the world it was good to actually see him in the flesh and withough moniters and needles all over him. he is our first nephew so it is pretty exciting. anyways....time for lunch.

I'll be home for christmas....for real this time!!

Merry Christmas everyone...warren and i are moving home!!! that is our crazy fly by the seat of our pants news...we have been thinking about this for a few months and we have now officially made the decision. so this means finding jobs, a place to live...dang it, we're starting all over again. there is just soo much going on in our life right now. we seriously need the support network that our friends and family (and church family) can provide. so though it kinda scares me...the unknown...i am just ecstatic to be going home. it's tough though because we really wanted to make it work here. we did. there have been just so many variables that have been part of this decision. our adoption plans are one of them. i don't even know why i feel the need to justify it. i know people will ask questions, and judge us, and gossip, but whatever...that is their problem. right now, i see a light at the end of the tunnel...and i am sure there will be more lights in the future, but for now this is just stop one.

my brain is buzzing.

so this weekend was our adoption seminar. i have not mentioned in any of my posts that we are infertile. officially. as in doctors said it was futile to try getting preggers the normal way. so this sucks to the 9th degree but we are coming to terms with it (after many hours of bawling my eyes out and yelling at God). This is the hardest thing of my entire life!!!! all i have ever wanted was to be a mommy and i can't. it won't work no matter what we do. we could try IVF, but the last time i checked we didn't have an extra 10,000 dollars sitting around in our account. and anyways, i don't really like needles enough that i would be willing to get poked everyday for a month or so straight only to have a failed attempt. forget it. so we have opted to apply to adopt. now begins masses of paperwork and stuff to do. we are really examining our future and looking at what we really want as a family. where do we see ourselves in 2, 3, 5 years? how do we want our kids to grow up? where do we want them to grow up? so we have lots of decisions to make. like i said, my brain is buzzing.

the fake tree

if i didn't have to use the computer in the office to do internety stuff i would post a picture of my new fake tree. that's right. i did it. i caved and bought a fake tree. this is a big step in my life. huge. so it is 7 1/2 feet tall and 58" wide. it is nice. but i can't figure out how to get the top on without it being so wobbly. real ones are just easier. bring it in. wait a few hours while it fluffs itself out, then decorate. then throw it out on january 1st. fake trees involves setting up, making the top not wobbly, spreading all the freaking 1288 tips out so that it looks real and then storing all year long. man oh man. i am already not looking forward to stuffing in that box. on the other hand, there will be no messy pine needles to clean up and we won't have to worry about watering when we are in morden for two weeks. i will miss our annual christmas tree light up...that is when we are done with out tree and it is dried out, we have usually lit it up in our backyard to see how fast it burns. so fun. *sigh* so this weekend i am hosting 4 groups. i am waiting for group #1 to show up. they said 5ish...so that could mean anytime. should be a busy weekend. oh, and everyone be proud of me...yesterday i bought TWO christmas presents. That's right...TWO and it isn't even december yet and they weren't even for me. that is a first. :)

friday finally

these next few weeks are going to be so long. camp has slowed down so much! i can't believe it! not only that, but for the next week we don't really have a "boss" to work with so it's kinda been pokey around here. today all i did was clean the pool, move some chairs, check some accomodations and then spent the rest of the afternoon helped a co worker move to a different house here on site. warren is coaching hockey tonight. they have a game in gimli so nathan and i are going to heckle the players. we sit in the stands and cheer for warren when he walks across the ice. then nathan looks at the program so he can tell what the players names are and then he cheers for them by name as if he has known them his whole life. it's funny and only mildly embarrassing. the only downfall to going to the games is that hot chocolate is like 2 bucks for a small little cup!! unbelievable! what is the world coming to. i might smuggle my own in tonight. warren is on call this weekend. i have no idea WHAT i am going to do. sit around and watch tv i guess...although we talked about hooking a snowboard up to the back of warren's quad and going snowboarding around. there are no hills here. none. morden seems like a rolling land of mountains compared to out here. hee hee. once the lake is frozen there will be more space for quadding and stuff...anyways...that was today. it snowed gently all day today. it was pretty. i am thinking about acutally buying a FAKE christmas tree. since we are going to morden for 2 weeks i won't be able to keep a real one alive. so this is a big thing for me. i am pretty anti fake tree. but i am hoping that costco has some good deals. i am ready to start decorating my little house. :)

getting chilly

i have decided that if you want to grow your hair out you should work a winter at camp. every day i put a touque on my head. it is worthless to even do a cute little hairdo because after half an hour in a hat your hair is flat and ugly looking and so you may as well just wear it all day long, inside and outside. So i run around all day dressed in winter outdoor stuff, looking and feeling like a marshmallow...only to go home to shower, change, do my hair and then sit around watching tv till the next day when i do it all over again. what is the point? no wonder people start looking "campy" after a while. i am starting to miss being pretty. and now since warren is on call for the next 2 weekends in a row it means we won't really be able to leave this place. for two straight weeks! i am going stir crazy. it's been years since i have been able to get addicted to tv shows. now i find myself living vicariously through my tv characters. yesterday House did something funny and i talked to the tv...i shook my head and said "house, what are you doing?" then i shook my head and thought, Amy, what are you doing talking to the tv?????

today it is snowing gently outside. it is very pretty. but the air is chilly outside. i'm working on Ultimate Day stuff today which is going good. it's in two weeks. speaking of which...i better get back to work. ;)

all dressed up and nowhere to go

it is sunday and my usual sunday routine is still not back to normal. it has not been normal since we moved here. but then again we have never worked weekends until now. our routine used to be get up, shower, go to church, go out for lunch with family and/or friends, go back home and decided what to do today. now it is ?????? every week is different. we try to go back to morden about once a month and so we go to church whenever we are there. I miss it. I miss the familiar smiling faces, eating cookies in the gym with friends, the babies in the nursery that were "mine" for one hour a week from september to may...i miss worshipping with other believers...i miss worship through music...period. Other sundays that we are not in morden and not working we try to go to Eastview Church in Winnipeg. so far since september that has only been twice. arg. so this morning (since i am working this weekend) i woke up...went to the dining hall to do breakfast duty, then went back home and got back into bed. finally i dragged myself to the shower. today i decided that even though i work at camp i don't have to look like i work at camp. i can still be pretty!!! so i medium dressed up...i'm talking nice jeans, nice white fall sweater, my nice jacket and a pink scarf (like the "in" kind). and i even did my hair curly today. we'll see how long that lasts with the wind. it is almost time to do to the Dining hall for lunch duty. i am getting sick of eating in there. the groups all leave this afternoon and then it will be time to check accomodations, tidy up and let camp rest until tomorrow morning.

my first blog

this is my first time ever blogging. since moving to Camp Arnes i have been feeling a little isolated and like i don't get to express me ever. there is no one to express to. so i have decided that this could be a good outlet. i don't care if anyone ever reads it...that's not the point. i just need to figure me out and this seems like a good idea. we'll see how long it lasts...